Politically speaking, I’m a pretty conservative person. Card carrying Republican and all that.
Just like Clint Eastwood. Yeah, me and Clint are a lot alike… 😉
For years I toed the “party line” on the subject of gay marriage. I wasn’t adamantly or vocally opposed to it; it just seemed wrong. I couldn’t even really vocalize why I felt gay marriage was wrong.
I definitely have never been “homophobic” or prejudiced / biased against LGBT people. I’ve got friends and family that are gay.
Enter my two children, currently ages 20 and 18. I love talking to my kids about all sorts of things, and the subject of “gay marriage” has come up on several occasions. And I got an earful from them. They are both pretty conservative too, especially my son. Both are adamant though that gay marriage is a non-issue. Or should be a non-issue. Ask either of them how they feel about gay marriage and the response is pretty much, “Why would I care if two people love each other and want to get married?”
So I listened to them. And they are right. It really is ridiculous to prohibit two people from getting married. If they love each other and want to be married, who cares if they are gay, bi-sexual, green, red, transgender or purple?
“Sanctity of marriage”? As my daughter says, “When Kim Kardashian’s wedding is splayed all over the media and her marriage lasts 72 days, there’s not really a whole lot of sanctity in that…”
As parents, our primary duties are to protect and teach our children.
We need to be aware that sometimes, our children can teach us a thing or two…
Photo: I don’t know who created the photo/quote of Clint Eastwood, I saw it on Facebook and it hit home. The quote is from an interview Eastwood did in the October 2011 issue of GQ Magazine. (Reuters)
That’s Clint, cloning his best “Walt Kowalski”. ( From the movie Gran Torino.) It would appear that Walt & Clint have a lot in common. He’s not one to mince words.
One day, in the not too distant future, we’ll look back and ask:
“What took so long?”
Simply a matter of civil rights and equity.
Ira
Our kids will be the generation that pushes the change over the goal line. Gteen1 wrote his first college essay at ASU on his “definition” of marriage last week. By the way his definition didn’t include getting the government’s permission (license) to do so 🙂 He claims to be a liberal but he sure does sound like a conservative!
Jay thanks for “coming out” with a sensible opinion on this topic. I am from a similar generation as your kids as you know and am excited to be a part of a generation far more tolerant of their fellow man than much of the previous ones. I would like to address, however, something that I find rather alarming pointed out in your ponder. What’s going on with all these purple people?!?! I am gravely concerned about their sudden desire to be a part of the great tradition of marriage and I think my ex wife would feel the same. I’m quite frankly tired of them shoving all this purple in my face and don’t even get me started on green folk. They need therapy! There is nothing normal about being brightly colored, with the exception of people with a bad sunburn of course, and I suggest we begin legislation to stop these abhorrent “rainbow warriors” !
I definitely think there needs to be a law against Kim Kardashian getting married again.
I am sure that as the current generation controlling the Republican Party moves on and the new generation comes forward that the GOP’s stance on this will change. I do not know of many people my age that are conservatives that do not feel the same as you do on this issue.
I remember reading something once about how a simplified view of the US Constitution is that the Founding Fathers of our great country envisioned a society where everyone was free to do what they want. That everyone had their own space that they could do with what they want, the only restrictions were that you couldn’t do anything that disturbed another person’s space. So if in your space you could practice your own religion, jump around, act like an idiot, speak your mind, pretty much do whatever you wanted and no one could stop you. The only restriction was that you could not infringe on another person’s enjoyment of their space.
I don’t really see how Gay Marriage affects another person’s space. I do totally understand how someone may feel it is morally wrong, that it may make them uncomfortable and that they may not like it. I respect their viewpoints, but I also respect the viewpoints of the two people that want to get married.
I am not gay, and I am never going to be in a gay marriage, I am also never going to be Muslim or Jewish (I am not trying to equate a gay lifestyle to religion, just using it as an example of life choices). I am completely against abortion, but am not in favor of a law that bans it for others. As a conservative I feel that as long as someone’s choices do not limit my enjoyment of life, why would I want to limit their choices. I suppose it is more of a Libertarian viewpoint. Government should not be those controlling factor for issues like this and I think that the younger generation of conservatives generally feel the same way. We are fiscally conservative, but share a different viewpoint than the Republican party on social issues.
Oh and Jay, it is a daring move to start making political posts. One that I applaud you for. The problem with politics and religion is that it is pretty much impossible to change another person’s views. Our society has become so hyper sensitive in political correctness it is ridiculous. People need to focus more on themselves and less on others.
@Dane – I totally love your comment agree with you! I’m going to have to use the “space” analogy.
I agree with Clint that we as a society (women, men, straight, gay, Christian, atheist, black, white, etc.) make too big a deal out of sex. In doing so, we’ve also reduced it as humans are so inclined to do when we worship things.
I would never reduce my friends to their sexual preference, because they are much more than that to me. I think this is particularly true for my friends who prefer expressing their love through homosexual sex. The love is what is important, not the sex.
For my hetero friends, however, sex takes on a bit more importance, because it has the potential to create a new life. Here, we’re way too casual about the consequences of our actions. Literally, we need to quit f’ing around.
As nice as the “space” argument sounds (just let me be!), it ignores the fundamental nature of humanity as creatures built for relationships (love). We’re not meant to be alone.
This is particularly true when it comes to abortion. Mom is very much not alone when she has a baby inside. Dane, in this regard, the position you expressed regarding not agreeing with abortion for yourself but but also not wanting it to be illegal for others simply avoids the critical question your “space” argument requires you to ask, namely whether the baby is a person or not. For, if it is, mom can’t make that decision without affecting another person’s space and violating your foundational principle.
Similarly, we don’t have sex with ourselves and, once we realize that, the act becomes much more about love and less about getting off. If I truly love my wife, will I feed a porn addiction? If I feed a porn addition, am I making love with my wife or just screwing someone.
For heterosexual young people out there, treating sex with the respect it and your partner deserves is likely the biggest decision you’ll make in your life. Remember that you have the incredible privilege and awesome responsibility of being able to create another human being. I don’t think I’m terribly prudish, but when I walk by the Abercrombie store in the mall, I’m convinced we’re pandering to our most base instincts way too much and not reveling in the joy and love of our humanity.
Perhaps a good summary is that I would like to see us worship sex less and worship life more.
Yeah I’m with Jay on this one. A generation form now this will be a complete non-issue, like inter-racial marriage or women showing their ankles at the beach. Things change, society evolves.
Thanks Jay for taking a stand on a controversial subject. If more people would think it through like that we might stop all the legislated bigotry going on.
Nice post Jay. I’m happy to hear that listening to your children is the key to this conversation. Me? I’m quite liberal when it comes to social issues, so this has been a non-issue for me over the years. It’s a hot button issue that I hope will go away in my lifetime. Sure there will always be people who dislike it, much like there are people that still wish the Klan was as popular as it once was, but society will always work that way. I just hope to see a day where we can let people love each other however they choose. All the major religions boil down to one crucial tenet: love. They can argue about the rules all they want, but in the end love rules over all. With that in mind, I see nothing that should stop us from allowing people to live within that love regardless of their sexual orientation. But that’s just the way I view most things – its not always how you get there, but it’s the finish line that matters.
This was a breath of fresh air to read. I hope that most conservatives feel this way, heck, even my nearly 70 year old mom who is very conservative and a real Christian (not the bible thumping judgmental type) feels this way. If younger conservatives and even enlightened older ones have progressed on this issue, why is bigoted legislation still being passed? It just makes me sick, knowing gay couples who are kinder and more committed than some of the absolute shameful marriages that are blasted to us every day via the tabloids and TV. This world is tough, and some people never do find love. Why are we legislating love? Why do small government advocates think the government telling you whom you can and cannot marry is in line with their ideals?
You have something in common with the President. Jay, when do you think the Republican Party will come around? Sooner or later than it did on interracial marriage?
[The president said that after years of lengthy discussions with friends and family, including his wife and two young daughters, he now “personally” believes gays and lesbians should have the right to marry.]
Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2012/05/14/newsweek-calls-obama-first-gay-president-on-cover/#ixzz1utEEkpik
Hi Jay, Like you, I learn lots from my children. I am not a conservative. Last year, when the huge broohaha over Chick-Fil-A was all over the internet, I suggested to my liberal children that we should boycott Chick-fil-A. My older boy looked at me and said “just as I have a to my opinion on gay marriage, Chick-Fil-A has a right their opinion. And just like that, I realized he was right. Being open to a viewpoint other than our own is what it’s all about.
I just wish that in all of this we could find a way to find mutual accommodation and respect, to be civil in our discussions, to grant love and grace, regardless of one’s convictions or beliefs. Unfortunately, we seem to have lost the ability to engage in meaningful dialog and allow our differences to polarize/alienate us….